Life Is Weird

Thursday, July 05, 2012

Life is life... that's my favourite phrase. I overuse it like a boss. But today... today I think life is weird is more appropriate. It's full of all these crazy expectations about how we should operate, and I'm just not 'all good' with a lot of these expectations. There are expectations to do with careers, and expectations to do with school, and expectations to do with relationships, and just all these guidelines on how things should work. And the other thing that gets me? The fact that we go through life, and we do all this stuff that we don't want to do, and that we hate, and I mean, yeah, there's basic stuff we have to do to live the way we want to live... but we get what? Like, 80-90 years to live our entire lives, and we spend so much of it doing all this crap we don't want to do, and living our lives the way people expect us to.

As far as careers expectations go, I'm pretty bad for putting those on myself. For the longest time I was all about ambition - I wanted to be a surgeon, a lawyer, a race car driver, you name it, I've wanted to do it [except, perhaps, spider wrangler] - and I wanted to live in the lap of luxury. But now that I've sort of grown up past that stage, I really just want to be happy, and comfortable. I expected myself to want to live in the city for the longest time. It makes sense to want to live in a city! You are close to everything, shopping, arts and culture, all that jazz, but I realized I have no wish to do that. I want to live in a meh-sized town, and have a happy family, in a cozy house, and enjoy the beautiful nature where I live, and have a good job that I enjoy that doesn't drive me crazy when I get home from it.

We go through all these motions to live a happy life, and I feel like we forget that life isn't about an endpoint - well it is... but the endpoint is sort of l-l-lame, for those of us who don't believe in an afterlife - but it's all about what happens you know... in between. This sounds so cliche, but it's true facts! Like, all the ambition in the world will put you in great places, I'm sure, but how much life are you wasting if you don't enjoy what you are doing in the meantime? I mean, I love reading my textbooks for school *pushes up glasses*, and I love learning, and going to class, and all that, so I really enjoy going to university, so it's not a big ol' pain in the butt that I wish was over. Sometimes I catch myself wishing that this summer was over - mostly because I just really don't like work etc. then I remember that it's one less summer I'll have, and maybe that's super depressing, and pessimistic, but it's true! You've got to accept the moments you have. I mean, you don't have to treasure them, and just love every minute of it [ie the dentist], but don't hate, appreciate. Because life is wack.