Packing... so much packing...

So here we are again - I feel like I've spent the whole of the last year and a bit in some stage of packing or unpacking... having moved from my hometown to my parents new house, two months later moving across the country, packing for various trips back home through the year, packing to move back across the country, unpacking what was left over from moving from home, and now packing to move to my new place in the city! Oh my goodness, you have no idea how excited I am to put down some permanent [for at least for three years] roots in two weeks! No more wondering at which home, and in which box my favourite zip up hoodie is! I'm looking at it right now. This hoodie was of particular concern for me this past year, turns out it was in a suitcase of random clothes that didn't fit me anymore!

The shared closet with my sister might be a little... interesting... but that's what storing out of season clothes is for!

In other news, I have my booklist - and it's way less than I thought it was going to be! Sweet deal! And I applied for my student card, so that should be ready for when I get to town at the end of next week - so I can pick up my transit pass, and be so ready for school on the 4th! I also took advantage of the "upload your own" photo for the ID card since I'll probably have some seriously puffy cheeks, and maybe even some sweet bruising from my wisdom teeth extraction next week... I just hope it'll all be gone by the first day of school... nothing like being a swollen chipmunk face for your first day at a new university... introductions of "No, I don't usually look like this. No I didn't get in a fight. Yes the blood drooling should stop eventually..." don't sound like a lot of fun to me.

I'm still pretty sad that I won't be at the other end of the hall from my Emily. I keep thinking about the first day back, and how I really would like for us to be able to help each other rearrange our rooms, and just chill out in each other's rooms... wow... this is making me depressed to write about! So I'm not going to! That's that.

Other than all that sad stuff, and organizational stuff, and packing stuff, I'M SO EXCITED! I've got ten days between moving, and the first day of school so I am going to get my explore on, and sleep. Yes, sleeping is pretty much top on my list of priorities right now! Then a few days after I get there, my friends from home start arriving [lots of my friends are going to be in the city, or on Vancouver Island as well, just at different schools, but I'll still get to see them!], and I'll get to see them! EXCITEMENT! Now back to packing...

The Whatever Games

I've never been one for games. Gym was my least favourite class, I'm not a big party gamer, I don't do board games really, so why would I play games where relationships are concerned? A lot of people spend so much time worrying so much about being the right amount of mysterious and coy in relationships [of the romantic variety]. I just don't get that! I have a strict "all the cards on the table" policy. I like to know what I'm working with. I don't like surprises. I like to know exactly what is going on, where everyone stands. So when it comes down to a choice on whether I tell someone that I like them, or love them, or whatever, I do. And I'd hope that they did the same. Luckily, as far as my life has been concerned, I've had excellent people who are very upfront about things. No need to skirt around a subject.

The thing is, if I tell you that I like you, and you don't like me back that way, that's alright. I'm not going to hate you [I'm not going to give up hope that you'll ever like me back, so I'm not going to like, start wearing my grey sweatsuit and picking my nose around you]. Yes, I feel rejection too, and it sucks; obviously I'd prefer it if you countered my long winded explanation of my affection with an "I love you too", but don't say it if you don't mean it! I'd rather know exactly how you do feel so I can weigh my options, and decide how I feel about that.

Life is way too short to be sitting around being mysterious. Maybe it's because I base my entire life on Taylor Swift songs... but I think it's wildly important to tell incredible people they're incredible, tell beautiful people they're beautiful, tell the people you love that you love them, and put yourself out there. As discussed with my [incredible, beautiful, and very loved] best friend, life is pretty damn boring, and you're going to miss out on a whole lot if you don't take risks.

And that's that.

Feeling Normal

A little sentiment for a mishmash of a post.

So today has been the first day that I really feel like it's summer. It's probably the fact that it's ridiculously hot - well, hot for me. I'm a "no more than 22" kind of girl, but it's pushing 30 and above today! I'm a hot mess. I've actually taken to my living room floor to keep the heat off, and it seems to be working!

These days there is very little that feels normal in my life... it sounds weird, but having grown up in the same house for 18 years, and now having lived in NS for the past year and put down roots there, it's so strange for me to come "home" and expect to feel normal. Things just aren't normal here! I know I've had the home rant time and time again, but this is a positive step! Tonight is the first night that it feels like my life here.

Maybe it has something to do with my little vacation to my hometown earlier this week. I felt like myself again while I was there. Not even like my university self. I actually felt like I'd never left. I don't know if this is a good thing or not - I embrace moving on, and am doing my best to roll with my ever changing life - but I have to say, it felt good to feel like I was back in my little puzzle slot.

Getting back together with friends, and not having to explain my past, why I am working somewhere I don't consider home, why I went to school 4,000 kilometers away from my family, what I like to do in my spare time, and just being able to have a conversation about the stuff we are interested in, friends, what one another has been up to, what we're excited for, and so on. It's so nice to be with people who know you. And my friends certainly know me - some of them I've known since we were 6 years old! If they don't know me, I don't know who would! It's nice in those moments where you can just pick up where you left off. Some of those moments can be particularly special when you didn't think they'd ever happen again. Sure, attachment can be a dangerous thing, it can stop you from moving on, and getting on with your life, but there's no reason to give up important people in your life if you have no reason to.

Anyway, that's my little spiel about that. I'm just happy where I'm at, at this very exact moment in time. It's a happy place. Then I'll go to bed, and there will only be 17 more days until I get to move to my new apartment, and start my whole new life at my new school... a tad daunting - particularly with the promise of a really wicked wisdom tooth extraction x4. I just hope I'm not swollen or bruised for my first day of school! And I have to remember to take my ID picture before the cutting open of my face...

I just had another completely unrelated thought: can I just point out how amazingly comforting it is to put one's hair in a ponytail and put one's glasses on after a long, tiring day? I don't wear contacts, but I also don't wear my glasses a lot of the time [I'm really bad with it right now, since my frames are driving me mental - I feel like they overpower my face, and they slide down my nose a lot], so when I finally put them on at the end of the day, and can actually read things without squinting, and a whole lot of guesswork, it's always super relaxing. And my hair is finally long enough for a ponytail that I can just do with an elastic, and not a whole assortment of barrets and bobby pins! Win of the day!

Well, that's about all I've got to say for now... I have a feeling I'll be blogging more soon... work is finishing soon, and we'll be back in a time and place where thinking is actually possible - not just napping, and eating. Hope all y'all are having a fabulous August so far!

Some Days I Wake Up Feeling Like...

Do y'all ever wake up feeling like the intro to this song? Literally like the whole world couldn't bring you down, and you may, in fact, puke rainbows and awesome all over everyone you see? Me too. Those are the days when my hair looks awesome and shiny, and my mascara doesn't get all over my glasses lenses. Usually I don't wear my glasses on those days, actually. I'm that good - my eyes are temporarily corrected without corrective lenses.

Me = Machine

I obviously look like this when I run.

So I know my running isn't exactly Iron Woman worthy quite yet, but I have to say that I'm very proud of myself! So I'm going to just have a little gloating session... because 4 weeks ago, I couldn't run for a minute and a half, and now, I'm running 5 minute intervals with 1.5 walking, and it's... well, not a breeze, but I can do it! And I don't hate my life after. I am really starting to understand why people get really into running. You feel good! And you feel super successful, and quite honestly, I feel even better about myself than I did before I started running! My body hasn't really changed, my legs are just getting more muscular, but I feel healthy, and that shows through, methinks.

One of the things that I really love about running, and I explained this to my sister earlier, is that it's half an hour that's just mine. No one can get me do anything, people don't hassle me, I just put in my headphones, and for half an hour, I get to just listen to my music, and have my brain to myself and just think about stuff I want to think about. It's almost meditative. Anyway, just thought I'd let you know that I'm just about halfway to my 5k!!! I also think it's making my hair grow faster. Maybe that's a giant lie... but I'd like to think that it's true.

Life Is Weird

Life is life... that's my favourite phrase. I overuse it like a boss. But today... today I think life is weird is more appropriate. It's full of all these crazy expectations about how we should operate, and I'm just not 'all good' with a lot of these expectations. There are expectations to do with careers, and expectations to do with school, and expectations to do with relationships, and just all these guidelines on how things should work. And the other thing that gets me? The fact that we go through life, and we do all this stuff that we don't want to do, and that we hate, and I mean, yeah, there's basic stuff we have to do to live the way we want to live... but we get what? Like, 80-90 years to live our entire lives, and we spend so much of it doing all this crap we don't want to do, and living our lives the way people expect us to.

As far as careers expectations go, I'm pretty bad for putting those on myself. For the longest time I was all about ambition - I wanted to be a surgeon, a lawyer, a race car driver, you name it, I've wanted to do it [except, perhaps, spider wrangler] - and I wanted to live in the lap of luxury. But now that I've sort of grown up past that stage, I really just want to be happy, and comfortable. I expected myself to want to live in the city for the longest time. It makes sense to want to live in a city! You are close to everything, shopping, arts and culture, all that jazz, but I realized I have no wish to do that. I want to live in a meh-sized town, and have a happy family, in a cozy house, and enjoy the beautiful nature where I live, and have a good job that I enjoy that doesn't drive me crazy when I get home from it.

We go through all these motions to live a happy life, and I feel like we forget that life isn't about an endpoint - well it is... but the endpoint is sort of l-l-lame, for those of us who don't believe in an afterlife - but it's all about what happens you know... in between. This sounds so cliche, but it's true facts! Like, all the ambition in the world will put you in great places, I'm sure, but how much life are you wasting if you don't enjoy what you are doing in the meantime? I mean, I love reading my textbooks for school *pushes up glasses*, and I love learning, and going to class, and all that, so I really enjoy going to university, so it's not a big ol' pain in the butt that I wish was over. Sometimes I catch myself wishing that this summer was over - mostly because I just really don't like work etc. then I remember that it's one less summer I'll have, and maybe that's super depressing, and pessimistic, but it's true! You've got to accept the moments you have. I mean, you don't have to treasure them, and just love every minute of it [ie the dentist], but don't hate, appreciate. Because life is wack. 

Just Call Me 'The Procrastinator'

So I really really had really really good intentions of actually trying to blog regularly. And I'm just failing so miserably. But I don't feel very guilty about it, because I've been doing other things, so I'm just going to say that I'll blog when I blog. And that's just that. But today I'm blogging - from work - but that's okay, because no one is currently buying anything. So I can utilise the internets.

So here's what's been goin' on:

I've been working lots and lots. Which is fine. It's pretty boring a lot of the time, but I get to talk to lots of people, and sort of just chat with people in my community, which is cool. Last week at the museum, I was supposed to take the old flowers and throw them out or whatever when I was closing up for the day, but this one peonie was just holding on for dear life, and I thought it was just the prettiest thing, so I took it home. It's still just enjoying life on my kitchen counter - it brightens my day.

Mes chats are still the most adorable things in the world. Simon has recently figured out how to get up into my loft, so he's spending lots of time making my heart race as he walks along the beams [which he can now jump to from the loft]. Betsy is her usual self, sneaking around, killin' mice, and being extremely aloof. They're both just starting to meow now - they just turned one in the past few weeks [we're not sure how old they were because they're adopted feral kitty babies], but we got them this week last year, so I'm guessing they're just over a year. But they only just started learning to meow. Simon's the funniest with it; he makes these little sounds that sound like he's just sort of experimenting with the concept of meowing... Betsy still just chirps, and opens her mouth silently at the door when she wants in or out. They're goofs.

This past weekend was Canada Day - Happy 145th birthday, my beloved country! - and we celebrated in true Canadian fashion with a few balloons, and a hotdog. Not really ones for huge celebrations, particularly on the west coast [in comparison to my other precious coast]. 

I'm getting more excited to be living in the city this year! Finally! I have to take a couple days off work next week and go to town to run some errands. It turns out, this running has made me lose weight in my tummy, but my hips are still going strong, and I don't think they're going to stop being their curvy selves any time soon, so I have to go on a quest for new pants... I need to go through all my clothes and just get rid of all the ones that I don't wear, or don't like, or give me armpit issues [I have serious issues with shirts that bunch in my armpits], and restock with things that I love and want to wear every day. 

Anyway, that's all that's new-ish in my life. Halfway to my 5k, and looking forward to a lovely run in the sun this afternoon after work! Hope y'all are enjoying these first few days of summer!

*Just a little aside - I know the layout/design of my blog has been going wild recently, but I've been slowly teaching myself some HTML stuff, and trying to give it a really cute design that people will like to look at while they peruse the site! So bear with me, I think we're nearing something that I can live with for a while!

Plus Que Run!

Wow wow! So started week 2 of my 5k training program today! Running for minute and a half, with two minute walking intervals.  Not bad, my friends, not bad! It honestly didn't feel like that much of a difference from week 1, where I was running one minute, walking a minute and a half. I do this thing where I get bogged down about 10 minutes into the session - just before the halfway mark - but once I hit halfway, I pick right back up again! I'm still super proud of myself for actually being able to do it. This morning was a bit more difficult to get out of bed, but that's just because I moved into my new loft/fort bed yesterday, and it was so toasty warm. But I dragged myself out, and was really glad that I did! I love running days, because I feel like I've accomplished something big by 6:30am. 

I'm thinking that I should probably do some cross-training/strength-training to balance out the running... I want to make sure I'm working all the muscle groupings, and not just my running muscles! I'm not sure quite how to start that, but if any of y'all have any insights into any good programs for this, my muscles will be forever appreciative! Another great thing about running has been that my dad is now joining me. He doesn't seem overly enthused about the 6am start time, but it's definitely nice to have the company. It also pushes me, because he's definitely fitter than me at this point, so I feel like I definitely can't walk when I'm supposed to be running. I will say that I haven't walked when I wasn't supposed to since the first day. That hilly route just killed me! I might find a new route soonish - probably next week - just for a change of scenery or something. I'm not sure. It seems silly to drive somewhere to run... but I honestly just can't deal with my road because it's so so steep, and once you've finished your run, you don't want to be hiking up a miserable hill. I think that's what did me in last time.

A Blustery Day, Pooh...

Ah yes. A blustery day indeed. And not such a good one when you sit outside all day. The little museum where I work isn't very big, so I spend most of my seven and a half hour day outside. Not a bad gig when it's sunny like it was yesterday, but man, when it's raining and windy and freezing there isn't a whole lot to love about it. The problem is mostly that I [like pretty much everyone] get really tense when I'm cold, and so my whole body is just aching from that. I wrapped up in a blanket and lots of sweaters, so I wasn't horribly uncomfortable for most of the day... but I do hope it's lovely and hot and sunny tomorrow. Then Monday-Tuesday are my working from home days, and Wednesday-Thursday I start my second job at one of the gift shops here! I'm sure it will be hot and sunny the days when I have to work inside. Classic life.

Tomorrow is also day two of my 5k training... I'm a little nervous for what it might bring, particularly because my legs are still doing quite poorly after day one... I've been hobbling around like someone stole all my joints. Stairs a quite a challenge currently. But my theory is that it will hurt much less to run because I'll be using the muscles the way that they're currently set to be used. I tried doing a bit of jogging around during the bits when it wasn't very busy at work, and it hurt much less than walking. So I guess we'll see! I also hope it's sunny tomorrow so my run will be a little more pleasant. Definitely going to drive to the end of my very steep, gravelly road so I can do the full 30 minutes on dry, flat pavement. According to my mum, she's going to join me, but we'll see just how into that idea she is at six tomorrow morning.

So all in all, let's just hope for a hot and sunny day tomorrow, and we'll see where that gets us! I'm really looking forward to a semi "weekend" while I work from home Monday and Tuesday, but in the mean time I think I will go to bed...

Couch to 5 [Days of Pain]

So today I started "training" for the "Couch to 5k". I did it like real healthy people do: I got up at 5:50 this morning, put on my leggings, and sweater [over my pyjamas - no biggie], and was out of the house by 6:01. When I reached the end of my road I had the decision to go left, or right. Right was sort of dark and whaaa, while left was sunny, and you can see the ocean that way, so I decided to go left.

Well, the world has a hilarious sense of humor. I forgot that the pretty, sunny, ocean view way is also like climbing Everest. So up and down, up and down I went, with my little iPod trainer, Constance, chirping away pleasantly in my ear "Let's start with a brisk walk!... Now let's bring that up to a jog!... Now I'm going to shoot you in the kneecaps, and I'd like you to run as fast as you can up this next hill before I punch you in the chest." Well thanks, Constance, I'm so glad you are so gosh darn happy at 6 in the morning. After half an hour of this torture, I it back home, and even went a little longer than my program said I had to - mostly because I had to get home. 

I didn't puke [although I did feel like I could have puked up my organs], I didn't cry [even though I thought I might when I reached the foot of the very, very, steep hill my house is on top of], and I didn't sit down in the middle of the road and refuse to keep going. My neighbour did look a little concerned as he passed me, sweaty and dragging my hot, tired body up our road [see: dirt track], but who's he to judge. I will be enormously fit and fabulous in not but nine weeks.  

Sunday is my next day of running, and I think I might have forgotten enough of the pain by then to actually drag myself out of bed and actually do it! Go me! Anyway, I'm very proud of myself for actually getting out of bed this morning, because as anyone who has been around me longer than 5 minutes knows, I say I'm going to work out, and then I nap instead. Napping burns all kinds of calories. 

I'm really going to try to keep it up this time. Apparently it stops being absolutely miserable after a while, and can be quite pleasant. Or so I've heard. One of my old teachers did this once, and now she runs marathons... so I think this sentiment might be true! A good sign! 

I sort of feel like a rockstar for actually doing physical activity [kayaking is usually about it for me]. A sore rockstar, but a rockstar nonetheless! Does anyone have any super tips on becoming a marathon winner that I should know about?

House Rules

House rules for my sister and I's apartment:

1. No making the balcony into any sort of smoking den (opium, fish, other).
2. No milkshakes - particularly fish milkshakes.
3. No hair cutting.
4. No seaweed.
5. Hot Lava Day is Wednesday.
6. BANG! You're Dead Day is Monday.
7. Hide and Seek Across Campus Day is Friday.
8. No weasels, or weasel like animals. That includes wiener dogs.
9. House meetings are mandatory on Sunday. Mid-morning-ish. Changes to the house meeting must be made two days in advance on some sort of cool stationery - to be bought through the stationery budget - and placed in the appropriate inbox/outbox.
10. Tuesday is taco night. For always.
11. Don't leave your stuff in the dryer.
12. No dirty dishes.
13. Appropriate ethics review necessary for all studies conducted in the apartment.
14. All documents are subject to peer review.
15. Watches should by synchronized at the weekly house meeting.
16. Fridge inventory to be taken at house meeting.
17. If both parties are waiting for the bus, there must be room on the bus for both parties. No stranding each other on public transit.
18. Headphones strongly encouraged for respective 20th century, and country music tastes.
19. Menu to be approved at weekly house meeting.
20. Raves need a permit.
21. All complaints should be directed to the head office, located on level one, in the pantry beside the hot water tank.
22. Emma Bear and Sarah Jane Brain Drain Bear will act as arbitrators for any unresolved disputes.
23. All nickels go into the Bank of Cat in order to save for something cool.
24. You puke, you clean up.
25. Study time is study time. No harassing studious people.
26. Have fun. Or else.